All too often we are chasing "happiness" and rather than accept that sadness is part and parcel of life we try to delve deeper into the "trauma" or the "why" rather than look instead to the "what".
What tipped me into this place of sadness?
At what point can I feel myself going into a downward spiral?
What can I do to stop this spiral?
You are allowed to feel sad without having a reason for it.
But you also have the ability to take note of that moment and decide that it is unlikely to be of any benefit to you in the long run and implementing certain "protocols" to pull you out or away from these feelings of unhappiness.
Understanding that we are in control of our emotions. That even those with chronic depression have the ability to see "that moment" where it's about to spiral and then implementing certain habits to pull themselves away from it is huge.
We are in charge of ourselves. It is very easy to get caught up with all the self help, "trauma" and self diagnoses of personality/mental health issues on social media.
But if you take a step back and say "STOP". STOP to all those racing thoughts and a moment for perspective.
You are here, in this life, living and breathing, you are loved, you are important to more people than you realise, you have a skillset / talent that no one else can replicate, you are unique and you are you and this moment is probably a moment that has happened many times in your life and yet you have overcome it and you're still here.
Creating small habits to handle moments of overwhelm, anxiety and depression* are key to a fitter mindset.
Say STOP to those racing thoughts.
Write down what has upset you or where you are at in your head.
Go for a walk and listen to nature around you.
Talk to someone.
Run, Ride, Cycle, Swim, Gym, Box whatever you love doing.
Your happiness lays in your ability to overcome your moments of sadness. It isn't in the material or the aesthetic. It is the capacity for creating a resilience mindset. It is also a time to ask yourself, if this is a repeated feeling, what needs to actually change in your life that will stop these moments of sadness occurring - stressful job, crap relationship, rubbish housemates... These are all things that you have the power to change.
So next time you are in a low place, instead of asking why, ask what. 9/10 you have the ability to change the situation and overcome that moment and that is where happiness lies.
*I am not devaluing the effects of severe depression and I would always recommend seeking support from counselling and other healthcare providers.